For whatever reason I always find myself blogging more when things aren't going well for me. It's not intentional, but I guess when things are going well for me - i'm out enjoying the good times!
So I thought it would only be appropriate that I mention that this has been a really good week!
Alot of it always has to do with perspective. I made a decision towards the end of last week that I was no longer going to get bogged down by all the BS. That I would rise above it and focus on the good. Totally worked! Yes, things are not perfect, but my attitude not sucking definitely helps with the imperfections:)
Exodus 14:13-14
13Moses told the people, Fear not; stand still (firm, confident, undismayed) and see the salvation of the Lord which He will work for you today. For the Egyptians you have seen today you shall never see again.
14The Lord will fight for you, and you shall hold your peace and remain at rest.
Showing posts with label Life. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Life. Show all posts
Thursday, March 18, 2010
Sunday, March 14, 2010
My Story
I had to write a reflection paper for my grad school class today and told a little bit of my story since the last 12 years. Thought i'd share here since i'm in a sharing mood...
My story is not that different from many others. When my brothers and I were very young, my parents decided that they wanted a better life for us. For many families this sometimes means that one parent will switch careers, or maybe one will stay home to raise the kids. It could mean going to church more or spending more time at the dinner table. For us it meant that my parents would sell all of their belongings and only pack the clothes that could fit into four suit cases and move us from Cape Towne, South Africa to Columbus, Ohio USA. At age four this only seemed like a big adventure; and really how much could a child imagine all of the changes that would take place throughout their life based on this move?
Fast forward to junior year of high school and all the excitement that comes with not only picking a college, but deciding on a career. Now considering the insight that I’ve gained since being a teenager, I’ve come to realize that as adults it’s a complete disservice to try and ask a high schooler what they want to do for the rest of their lives and expect them to not only know without any uncertainty, but then to also carry that out without fail.
I always knew that I wanted to be a Journalist. I had all the soft skills: consistent ability to talk to anyone about anything, the desire to write papers, essays, poems and anything else people would read, and I should mention my “top notch” investigative skills. To this day research and background information are essential to me before I embark on anything. I’ve got to know the four W’s: Why, What, When and Where no matter the situation big or small. This thirst for knowledge has served me well, but also causes me to grossly over think so many minute details.
So back to picking a school. I wanted to be in a big city. I wanted a student body with a diverse population. I wanted the opportunity to follow my dreams and not have anyone around who would tell me those dreams were an impossibility. I chose a school in Suburban Chicago. About 45 minutes from “the Loop.” Perfect I thought. I couldn’t have been more wrong. That first year of school was probably one of the worst years of my life. Significant family problems took their toll on me both physically and mentally and eventually would prohibit me from returning for a second year. I was crushed. I had just started finding my niche and also really discovering who I was as a person, that wasn’t defined from being an immigrant or being an athlete or being “fill in the blank here.”
Through no deliberate choice of my own I ended up having to skip a year and a half of my education. What would have been my sophomore and first half of my junior year of college I spent working. I should have mentioned that one of my God giving talents is determination. I was determined that no matter how long it took, I would get back to school. That my dreams weren’t dead they were only on hold. In January of 2001, I packed my bags ready to start over at yet another suburban Chicago school as a 21 year old freshman. Not an ideal situation, but I did it! This time I chose to switch directions a bit (since none of my previous credits counted) I chose the Advertising/Public Relations route. A little more creative, but still right up my ally. The family problems continued as well as another unwelcome roadblock – anxiety attacks. Still I finished my degree in Interdisciplinary Communications and Business Management.
I started at Nationwide in 2006, about a year and half after I graduated from college and moved back to Columbus. I took my then job as a “stepping stone” position. To learn about the company and build my skills as a professional. I’ve always seen myself as someone not limited by their circumstance, or victimized by their past circumstances, but as a someone who can use all those stories and experiences to encourage others and be an example of what hard work and determination can lead to.
These classes at Marketing U have given me the opportunity to not only enhance my knowledge of Marketing, but tap back into all the things I love about the discipline. Some of the classes have not been as easy as others and this one definitely tackled the analytical side of my brain versus the creative side which is always churning away.
· I learned that my voice is still strong and valued even when I perceive it to be at a disadvantage.
· I learned that my experience in the work place can still be of use even though it is not specific to the subject matter at hand.
· I learned that despite having a million things going on, it’s possible to focus on just one at a time.
One of my favorite poems by Robert Frost ends with:”I took the road less traveled by, and that has made all the difference.” This is my story. The road less traveled by. It’s the opportunity that this class has continued to give me. I will always be grateful for what I have learned in these last weeks and the knowledge that will last me a lifetime.
My story is not that different from many others. When my brothers and I were very young, my parents decided that they wanted a better life for us. For many families this sometimes means that one parent will switch careers, or maybe one will stay home to raise the kids. It could mean going to church more or spending more time at the dinner table. For us it meant that my parents would sell all of their belongings and only pack the clothes that could fit into four suit cases and move us from Cape Towne, South Africa to Columbus, Ohio USA. At age four this only seemed like a big adventure; and really how much could a child imagine all of the changes that would take place throughout their life based on this move?
Fast forward to junior year of high school and all the excitement that comes with not only picking a college, but deciding on a career. Now considering the insight that I’ve gained since being a teenager, I’ve come to realize that as adults it’s a complete disservice to try and ask a high schooler what they want to do for the rest of their lives and expect them to not only know without any uncertainty, but then to also carry that out without fail.
I always knew that I wanted to be a Journalist. I had all the soft skills: consistent ability to talk to anyone about anything, the desire to write papers, essays, poems and anything else people would read, and I should mention my “top notch” investigative skills. To this day research and background information are essential to me before I embark on anything. I’ve got to know the four W’s: Why, What, When and Where no matter the situation big or small. This thirst for knowledge has served me well, but also causes me to grossly over think so many minute details.
So back to picking a school. I wanted to be in a big city. I wanted a student body with a diverse population. I wanted the opportunity to follow my dreams and not have anyone around who would tell me those dreams were an impossibility. I chose a school in Suburban Chicago. About 45 minutes from “the Loop.” Perfect I thought. I couldn’t have been more wrong. That first year of school was probably one of the worst years of my life. Significant family problems took their toll on me both physically and mentally and eventually would prohibit me from returning for a second year. I was crushed. I had just started finding my niche and also really discovering who I was as a person, that wasn’t defined from being an immigrant or being an athlete or being “fill in the blank here.”
Through no deliberate choice of my own I ended up having to skip a year and a half of my education. What would have been my sophomore and first half of my junior year of college I spent working. I should have mentioned that one of my God giving talents is determination. I was determined that no matter how long it took, I would get back to school. That my dreams weren’t dead they were only on hold. In January of 2001, I packed my bags ready to start over at yet another suburban Chicago school as a 21 year old freshman. Not an ideal situation, but I did it! This time I chose to switch directions a bit (since none of my previous credits counted) I chose the Advertising/Public Relations route. A little more creative, but still right up my ally. The family problems continued as well as another unwelcome roadblock – anxiety attacks. Still I finished my degree in Interdisciplinary Communications and Business Management.
I started at Nationwide in 2006, about a year and half after I graduated from college and moved back to Columbus. I took my then job as a “stepping stone” position. To learn about the company and build my skills as a professional. I’ve always seen myself as someone not limited by their circumstance, or victimized by their past circumstances, but as a someone who can use all those stories and experiences to encourage others and be an example of what hard work and determination can lead to.
These classes at Marketing U have given me the opportunity to not only enhance my knowledge of Marketing, but tap back into all the things I love about the discipline. Some of the classes have not been as easy as others and this one definitely tackled the analytical side of my brain versus the creative side which is always churning away.
· I learned that my voice is still strong and valued even when I perceive it to be at a disadvantage.
· I learned that my experience in the work place can still be of use even though it is not specific to the subject matter at hand.
· I learned that despite having a million things going on, it’s possible to focus on just one at a time.
One of my favorite poems by Robert Frost ends with:”I took the road less traveled by, and that has made all the difference.” This is my story. The road less traveled by. It’s the opportunity that this class has continued to give me. I will always be grateful for what I have learned in these last weeks and the knowledge that will last me a lifetime.
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
Rain YES!!
Don't be alarmed. I haven't been abducted by aliens. Normally I would give the rain a thumbs down. 99 out of 100 times I hate it. Yes hate. Not today.
Today i'm liking it - let me explain why. There's a song on my Christian radio station that I think we can all relate to no matter what our religious preferences. I don't any of the exact words except for "Jesus bring the rain." My interpretation about the lyrics is that that the artist is asking God for a little bit of rain (normally bad) to bring out the good in him. To show him how strong he is and how strong his resolve to be a person of faith is. I've been really challenged with this lately because I feel like i've not really displayed my "best side" during the last couple challenges i've faced. I've given into reacting the way I see others react to situations to try and get the same result they do (their own way.) So the last few days i've really tried to stay true to myself and the values that I hold close to my heart despite what's going on around me.
So today it rained and messed up my car wash ha ha! But I am grateful. I feel like the rain was washing away the rest of the dirty snow and with that dirty snow all the stressful emotions of the last few weeks since it was dumped on us. Hopefully. Cross your fingers.
Today i'm liking it - let me explain why. There's a song on my Christian radio station that I think we can all relate to no matter what our religious preferences. I don't any of the exact words except for "Jesus bring the rain." My interpretation about the lyrics is that that the artist is asking God for a little bit of rain (normally bad) to bring out the good in him. To show him how strong he is and how strong his resolve to be a person of faith is. I've been really challenged with this lately because I feel like i've not really displayed my "best side" during the last couple challenges i've faced. I've given into reacting the way I see others react to situations to try and get the same result they do (their own way.) So the last few days i've really tried to stay true to myself and the values that I hold close to my heart despite what's going on around me.
So today it rained and messed up my car wash ha ha! But I am grateful. I feel like the rain was washing away the rest of the dirty snow and with that dirty snow all the stressful emotions of the last few weeks since it was dumped on us. Hopefully. Cross your fingers.
Thursday, March 4, 2010
Trying to fit a square peg into a round hole
This is seriously how I feel right now. Honestly I just keep asking myself "what am I doing wrong?" For a very long time I have not felt like my best was not good enough. But right now, I can come up with nothing that is good. I'm in more than just a funk. The reality is that things are not going well for me right now. Personally, professionally...all the ally's are not giving me anything to hang on to...it's very sad. I'm in a constant state of feeling sorry for myself and in a more constant state of trying to not feel sorry for myself. The contradiction itself is enough to cause my heartbeat to race.
I am a glass half full person. But as we speak (well I type and you read) my glass is literally half empty. I dunno what to do? Really I don't? I'm trying to quote Bible verses, and stay busy, and exercise, and eat right, and spend time with those that matter...but it's just not adding up:(
I thought...maybe if I go on a vacation? What if I went to Chicago for the weekend? But then I think "I shouldn't travel because what if something happens with work? I'll be mad I spent the money!" But then the me that's always sunny thinks "everything will be fine, and you should surround yourself with people and things that you love."
This post is so depressing...i'm sorry! But, I do feel better getting a little of it out there:)
I am a glass half full person. But as we speak (well I type and you read) my glass is literally half empty. I dunno what to do? Really I don't? I'm trying to quote Bible verses, and stay busy, and exercise, and eat right, and spend time with those that matter...but it's just not adding up:(
I thought...maybe if I go on a vacation? What if I went to Chicago for the weekend? But then I think "I shouldn't travel because what if something happens with work? I'll be mad I spent the money!" But then the me that's always sunny thinks "everything will be fine, and you should surround yourself with people and things that you love."
This post is so depressing...i'm sorry! But, I do feel better getting a little of it out there:)
Sunday, February 28, 2010
OK
So it's Sunday (no kidding you say?) Sunday always makes me think of Monday and then suddenly i'm in a horrible mood. Well it's not horrible exactly, it's more malaise peppered with a little anxiety.
I had a horrible week last week. HORRIBLE. Seriously one thing after the next just kept going wrong and I could not get my mind to snap into "I will survive" mode. Without the kindness and friendship of a few key people I would have seriously taken a trip to the middle of nowhere and gladly stayed there.
So i'm thinking this week has got to be different! I must make it different! I've got to gather my killer optimism, by natural energetic bounce and my personal favorite: motivator to all those around me.
I needed alot of motivation last week. So sad because I hate having a pity party. But the pity sometimes is a necessary evil....dontcha think? I feel much better having been patted on the back a few times, but i'm ready to kick it into gear tomorrow! So dare I say this??? But c'mon Monday - show me what you got! I've got an army on my side that can last longer than 24 hours! HA!
I had a horrible week last week. HORRIBLE. Seriously one thing after the next just kept going wrong and I could not get my mind to snap into "I will survive" mode. Without the kindness and friendship of a few key people I would have seriously taken a trip to the middle of nowhere and gladly stayed there.
So i'm thinking this week has got to be different! I must make it different! I've got to gather my killer optimism, by natural energetic bounce and my personal favorite: motivator to all those around me.
I needed alot of motivation last week. So sad because I hate having a pity party. But the pity sometimes is a necessary evil....dontcha think? I feel much better having been patted on the back a few times, but i'm ready to kick it into gear tomorrow! So dare I say this??? But c'mon Monday - show me what you got! I've got an army on my side that can last longer than 24 hours! HA!
Monday, January 4, 2010
Recap Failure
So I totally failed at recapping 2009. I just ran out of time...or maybe I was unmotivated? I don't actually know that anyone reads this either, so maybe I was just recapping it for myself? Either way as far as you know my year ended in April ha ha!! No actually it was a really good year! I felt discouraged on New Years Eve when reading a bunch of Facebook statuses that said things to the effect of "good riddance 2009!"
Now I know the economy was not good, and the housing market still sucked etc etc. But for me (and everything is about me) it was a good year. I learned alot about myself and took alot of steps in doing things for myself and not everyone else. Sometimes I think I substituted enabling one group of people to enable another, but that's not entirely true. I accomplished alot of goals and took action to better my life professionally, personally and most importantly spiritually.
I truly do feel like I grew up alot in 2009. I also eliminated a few one sided relationships and have made new friends who I believe are in my life to stay. I learned what it's like to meet a companion and now know the characteristics i'd like that companion to have.
I hate the fact that I might be jinxing myself, but seriously, 2010 is off to a great start! I know that if 2009 was a rebuilding year, than this one will build on all it's successes! Cheers 2010!
Now I know the economy was not good, and the housing market still sucked etc etc. But for me (and everything is about me) it was a good year. I learned alot about myself and took alot of steps in doing things for myself and not everyone else. Sometimes I think I substituted enabling one group of people to enable another, but that's not entirely true. I accomplished alot of goals and took action to better my life professionally, personally and most importantly spiritually.
I truly do feel like I grew up alot in 2009. I also eliminated a few one sided relationships and have made new friends who I believe are in my life to stay. I learned what it's like to meet a companion and now know the characteristics i'd like that companion to have.
I hate the fact that I might be jinxing myself, but seriously, 2010 is off to a great start! I know that if 2009 was a rebuilding year, than this one will build on all it's successes! Cheers 2010!
Saturday, December 26, 2009
Year in Review - February
Despite the plain yuckiness of February, the snow, the slush the cold...this was a a great month for me. I decided that it was in fact time for a new car since my gas guzzling suv was not doing me any favors. After having looked and test driven Audi's the previous summer, I finally found mine! Actually it more or less found me. I got a really good deal on my Audi and became it's proud owner on Valentines Day. Since i'm not a fan of "Hallmark holidays" the irony of giving myself a really great gift on this day was pretty fun! Who needs chocolates that last a day when you can drive in luxury everyday?
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
Mexico Recap
Holy mole!! Can't believe I didn't do a recap of this trip yet. Actually I can. I've been on the go since I got home very late last Monday night. Tis the season, right?
So here's Mexico in one word or phrase:
Airport, 5 AM. Chicago, 7 AM. Meeting up with the girls. Chatting. Plan to PV. Are we there yet? Hot and humid! Red light/green light. Holy panhandlers. Cab Ride. Fiesta Americana. Upgrading to the 9th floor. Walking to Soriana. Unpacking. Showers. Going to the Malecon. Dinner? Sleep! Vallarta Adventures! Whale watching. Snorkeling! Ahhh opposite currents:( Lunch buffet. Cocktails. Feliz Cumpleanos. Tequila! Nap time! Malecon...dinner...walking...sleeping. Breakfast. Pool time! Walk on the beach. Photo ops. Ay Caramba. Hilo. Zoo. New friends from Houston. Rough night:( Massages. Old Towne. OXXO. Pool. Nap. Showers. Barcelona tapas - best in PV. Malecon. Packing. Sleep. Pool. Cab to airport. More gross food. Plane. Chicago. International to domestic terminal. Plane. Home.
So here's Mexico in one word or phrase:
Airport, 5 AM. Chicago, 7 AM. Meeting up with the girls. Chatting. Plan to PV. Are we there yet? Hot and humid! Red light/green light. Holy panhandlers. Cab Ride. Fiesta Americana. Upgrading to the 9th floor. Walking to Soriana. Unpacking. Showers. Going to the Malecon. Dinner? Sleep! Vallarta Adventures! Whale watching. Snorkeling! Ahhh opposite currents:( Lunch buffet. Cocktails. Feliz Cumpleanos. Tequila! Nap time! Malecon...dinner...walking...sleeping. Breakfast. Pool time! Walk on the beach. Photo ops. Ay Caramba. Hilo. Zoo. New friends from Houston. Rough night:( Massages. Old Towne. OXXO. Pool. Nap. Showers. Barcelona tapas - best in PV. Malecon. Packing. Sleep. Pool. Cab to airport. More gross food. Plane. Chicago. International to domestic terminal. Plane. Home.
Year in Review - January
I decided a couple of weeks ago that I would recap my year via this blog and try and reflect on mostly the good things that happened. Overall, this was a good year for me. I've done alot for myself and I can honestly say i've started to put myself first.
So January...cold, snowy and usually when the winter blues set in! Late in December Emily and the kids moved back from Iceland, so December was a bit of a transition month in my homestead. Emily started grad school and aunt Renschke was watching kids a couple of days a week.
One of my resolutions had been to cut out a relationship that was going nowhere and I sort of failed at that the very first weeks of the year...oops! Live and learn, right?
That's pretty much all I can remember from January so I think that means I didn't have much to complain about ha ha!!
So January...cold, snowy and usually when the winter blues set in! Late in December Emily and the kids moved back from Iceland, so December was a bit of a transition month in my homestead. Emily started grad school and aunt Renschke was watching kids a couple of days a week.
One of my resolutions had been to cut out a relationship that was going nowhere and I sort of failed at that the very first weeks of the year...oops! Live and learn, right?
That's pretty much all I can remember from January so I think that means I didn't have much to complain about ha ha!!
Wednesday, December 2, 2009
13 Years
My favorite story about my grandma goes like this: when we first moved to Columbus we actually lived in a hotel (not quite like Eloise at The Plaza.) Well it was the summertime so mostly we went to the park and then watched tv when it got to hot to go out. I had seen many commercials for Little Debbie snack cakes and I was convinced that "all Americans ate Ho-Ho's." Everytime one of these commercials came on I would make a grand production of pointing it out. Well even as a kid once got an idea in my mind, I couldn't get it out! I had made up my mind that we were going to take a little walk across 161 to the closest convenience store to get some (for those of you who don't live in Columbus, picture the busiest road across the middle of town and that's 161.) My grandma would literally do anything for us and after days of plotting my scheme I convinced her to take us over there. To this day honestly i'm not sure if my mamma just had crazy faith in her guardian angels, didn't really realize the risk involved or was trying to teach me a lesson in courage?
I will tell this story to my grandkids someday and recall it the same way I did at her funeral all those years ago. And I hope they will look at me with the same admiration that I always looked at her with:)
I will tell this story to my grandkids someday and recall it the same way I did at her funeral all those years ago. And I hope they will look at me with the same admiration that I always looked at her with:)
Monday, November 30, 2009
Goodness!
Well by all intents and purposes this is a manic Monday! No seriously I finished all my work tasks by about 9 AM, and have seriously been playing in the land of email chains and party planning since then.
Now don't get me wrong I heart party planning, but when too many cooks get in the kitchen, the dishes don't get done. Know what i'm sayin? K enough about that.
I've blogged alot in the last couple of days, but mostly because i've had the ideas come to me and i've been able to get to a computer uninterrupted, so yay for sharing my thoughts with the world (I mean two people who read my blog.)
I feel like there is so much going on and yet nothing at the same time, so I thought i'd share some highlights from the weekend. I didn't want to ruin my Thanksgiving blog by saying anything negative, so i'll do it today:)
1. After offering to bring anything from a pie, to a side dish, to pop - all of my offers were declined by the powers that be. So I brought the pumpkin pie that I got after finishing the Turkey Trot earlier that morning. Not my style, but whatever. I was then told by said powers that my contribution was "heartfelt and thought out." Hilarious.
2. Yes at some point my mom did make a comment about me being "uptight." I believe the exact phrase went like this "despite all your traveling, education, job...you're still so uptight. In other words that stick is still lodged where it has been most of your life." This is equally as hilarious as #1. I'm still wondering what i'm so uptight about?
3. Black Friday shopping sucked! What exactly were people buying? I saw nothing that I had to have...strange the lines were intense regardless.
4. I was a little bored. What did I used to do with four days off of work? Why does it seem like the more people I meet, the fewer I have to hang out with?
5. Finally a good one - got to catch up with Kari last night. Love love how someone you don't talk to everyday has such a fresh and unbiased opinion of things going on in your life. This is why Kari and I have been friends since the first time we met 8 years ago!
Now don't get me wrong I heart party planning, but when too many cooks get in the kitchen, the dishes don't get done. Know what i'm sayin? K enough about that.
I've blogged alot in the last couple of days, but mostly because i've had the ideas come to me and i've been able to get to a computer uninterrupted, so yay for sharing my thoughts with the world (I mean two people who read my blog.)
I feel like there is so much going on and yet nothing at the same time, so I thought i'd share some highlights from the weekend. I didn't want to ruin my Thanksgiving blog by saying anything negative, so i'll do it today:)
1. After offering to bring anything from a pie, to a side dish, to pop - all of my offers were declined by the powers that be. So I brought the pumpkin pie that I got after finishing the Turkey Trot earlier that morning. Not my style, but whatever. I was then told by said powers that my contribution was "heartfelt and thought out." Hilarious.
2. Yes at some point my mom did make a comment about me being "uptight." I believe the exact phrase went like this "despite all your traveling, education, job...you're still so uptight. In other words that stick is still lodged where it has been most of your life." This is equally as hilarious as #1. I'm still wondering what i'm so uptight about?
3. Black Friday shopping sucked! What exactly were people buying? I saw nothing that I had to have...strange the lines were intense regardless.
4. I was a little bored. What did I used to do with four days off of work? Why does it seem like the more people I meet, the fewer I have to hang out with?
5. Finally a good one - got to catch up with Kari last night. Love love how someone you don't talk to everyday has such a fresh and unbiased opinion of things going on in your life. This is why Kari and I have been friends since the first time we met 8 years ago!
Sunday, November 22, 2009
Alone
I'm not good at being alone. I don't pretend to be. I prefer to always have someone around me, even if I don't want to talk to that person, I want there to be a warm body somewhere nearby.
I think it's because i've always grown up with a strong sense of community and the credo that "we can't do anything alone, everything is done better with a companion." This can apply to all relationships - work, romantic, friendship and family.
So here's the thing: i'm learning to be alone. I'm learning that it's okay to spend a Saturday night alone. That Friday, Saturday, Sunday - they're just like any other night. There's so much pressure to be constantly doing activities and not doing them alone, i've been conditioned to think that if i'm not around someone else that must mean no one wants to be around me. I'm going to bash this lie with everything I have in me. There are tons (okay maybe not tons) but a few people that would love to spend time with me. You just can't always be around those people!
And it's good to be alone. To replenish your inner energy. To discover and think and find the things that you're good at, so that when you're with those people you have something to bring to the table that will make them feel good too.
Now i'm not saying i'm not going to complain about being alone, but I really am going to try and be better at it.
I think it's because i've always grown up with a strong sense of community and the credo that "we can't do anything alone, everything is done better with a companion." This can apply to all relationships - work, romantic, friendship and family.
So here's the thing: i'm learning to be alone. I'm learning that it's okay to spend a Saturday night alone. That Friday, Saturday, Sunday - they're just like any other night. There's so much pressure to be constantly doing activities and not doing them alone, i've been conditioned to think that if i'm not around someone else that must mean no one wants to be around me. I'm going to bash this lie with everything I have in me. There are tons (okay maybe not tons) but a few people that would love to spend time with me. You just can't always be around those people!
And it's good to be alone. To replenish your inner energy. To discover and think and find the things that you're good at, so that when you're with those people you have something to bring to the table that will make them feel good too.
Now i'm not saying i'm not going to complain about being alone, but I really am going to try and be better at it.
One Week
I'm tempted to start singing "Season of Love" from RENT. How do you measure???
So it's been a week since my visit to the ER. Here's the whole story and it's a little gross in parts...
A month ago, almost exactly to day October 20th I made an appointment to see my doctor. My ear did not feel like and there was some weird crust that had started to take up residence in it as well. Well the substitute doc assured me I was okay since "I didn't even have a fever etc" and sent me on my way. Yes I am a mild hypochondriac, but I was SURE something was wrong with me.
Fast forward to last Friday. I had seriously been going to bed by 9 the entire week because I just didn't feel good. And on Friday weird crusty ear returned! It became increasingly more difficult to hear and I figured I was just getting a cold. Saturday morning I was hanging out with my friend Simi and my ear was literally throbbing with odd stabbing pains. I was pretty sluggish all day and decided to go over to my moms to have her check out the ear. All the while I was in moderate pain. My mom was unable to make heads or tails of the situation because my ear was pretty swollen and also it was very PAINFUL and unable to stand even the slightest touch.
I slept about 2 hours on Saturday night and Sunday was left with no choice but to hit up the ER.
Of course it's lame in there not to mention gross even at a nice suburban hospital and I was pretty low on the totem pole until I almost passed out in the room they put me in.
The doctor confirmed I had an inner AND outer ear infection as well as a perforated eardrum. Nice...not really. Antibiotics, painkillers and cold medicine became the order of the day.
However - the pain did not go away - until Tuesday. Well this is when my eardrum actually burst. Yes burst and that's why the pain stopped. So fast forward to Sunday where I feel okay since sleeping no less than 12 hours a night for the last week. Oh and cleaning the gross aftermath of the burst is also very fun! So if you're wondering why i've been m.i.a. the last few days, no you know...feel bad for me yet???
So it's been a week since my visit to the ER. Here's the whole story and it's a little gross in parts...
A month ago, almost exactly to day October 20th I made an appointment to see my doctor. My ear did not feel like and there was some weird crust that had started to take up residence in it as well. Well the substitute doc assured me I was okay since "I didn't even have a fever etc" and sent me on my way. Yes I am a mild hypochondriac, but I was SURE something was wrong with me.
Fast forward to last Friday. I had seriously been going to bed by 9 the entire week because I just didn't feel good. And on Friday weird crusty ear returned! It became increasingly more difficult to hear and I figured I was just getting a cold. Saturday morning I was hanging out with my friend Simi and my ear was literally throbbing with odd stabbing pains. I was pretty sluggish all day and decided to go over to my moms to have her check out the ear. All the while I was in moderate pain. My mom was unable to make heads or tails of the situation because my ear was pretty swollen and also it was very PAINFUL and unable to stand even the slightest touch.
I slept about 2 hours on Saturday night and Sunday was left with no choice but to hit up the ER.
Of course it's lame in there not to mention gross even at a nice suburban hospital and I was pretty low on the totem pole until I almost passed out in the room they put me in.
The doctor confirmed I had an inner AND outer ear infection as well as a perforated eardrum. Nice...not really. Antibiotics, painkillers and cold medicine became the order of the day.
However - the pain did not go away - until Tuesday. Well this is when my eardrum actually burst. Yes burst and that's why the pain stopped. So fast forward to Sunday where I feel okay since sleeping no less than 12 hours a night for the last week. Oh and cleaning the gross aftermath of the burst is also very fun! So if you're wondering why i've been m.i.a. the last few days, no you know...feel bad for me yet???
Monday, September 28, 2009
The Last 6 Days...
SO MUCH GOING ON!! See my next post for deets on the next 30 days of my life!
Volleyball tournament on Tuesday. Losing to the only team that beat us although I truly believe we could've beat them were it not for the mind games. Wednesday getting much needed "roots" fixed up and truly loving and finding new hair girl. Thank you Olivia who also happens to live a couple of blocks away from me. Coming home to pre Kings of Leon party and my first love standing in my apartment. Weird. Supposedly many peoples first love. I don't really care about that. Ha. Bodega then the Schott for the Kings who rocked. And apparently have songs that I have never heard before. At the Rossi after-the-show and staying up WAY too late. Thursday. Someone hustling down the stairs when I wake up for work. Vomit. Vomit. Pick up Kari at the airport and go say hi to mom. Mediocre lunch and two hours at F21. ROWE boutique fashion show. Chatting up Terri Stevens from Project Runway like we're old friends. Models walking a catwalk around a pool. Is this really my life? Kristin is still one of the most kind people I have ever known. Falling in love with foldover boots:) Kari gets to try a Rossi burger and I meet spot some Blue Jackets. This could be a really fun season. Get two Charley Horses. Two for realz. Friday is pancakes and strolling through Short North/Arena District/Downtown. Happy Hour at Hyde Park and Elderflower Martini's. Oh and the Blue Jackets again. Vino 100. Bar 23 with Josh and Joe from High School. Did I already say vomit? Street Meet. Cannot call it Meat. Also disgusting. Waking up very late on Saturday and missing yoga at Lulu. Egg Sandwiches for breakfast made by yours truly. Driving through campus because it's too rainy to tailgate. Going to my mom's to see the kiddos. Back to F21 and back to the airport. Tim Hortons for soup. I still can't walk v good:( Crew game with mom and dad, doesn't rain at all! Yippee. Take a Saturday night off and sleep in on Sunday. Church then grocery store. Returning M.A.C. that I don't need, but really want. Endless activity of putting stuff away. Over to Molly's to watch Desperate Housewives and Brothers & Sisters. Cookies. Ugh Monday and back at my desk. Wishing I could say what I need to say. 6 days. Wow!
Volleyball tournament on Tuesday. Losing to the only team that beat us although I truly believe we could've beat them were it not for the mind games. Wednesday getting much needed "roots" fixed up and truly loving and finding new hair girl. Thank you Olivia who also happens to live a couple of blocks away from me. Coming home to pre Kings of Leon party and my first love standing in my apartment. Weird. Supposedly many peoples first love. I don't really care about that. Ha. Bodega then the Schott for the Kings who rocked. And apparently have songs that I have never heard before. At the Rossi after-the-show and staying up WAY too late. Thursday. Someone hustling down the stairs when I wake up for work. Vomit. Vomit. Pick up Kari at the airport and go say hi to mom. Mediocre lunch and two hours at F21. ROWE boutique fashion show. Chatting up Terri Stevens from Project Runway like we're old friends. Models walking a catwalk around a pool. Is this really my life? Kristin is still one of the most kind people I have ever known. Falling in love with foldover boots:) Kari gets to try a Rossi burger and I meet spot some Blue Jackets. This could be a really fun season. Get two Charley Horses. Two for realz. Friday is pancakes and strolling through Short North/Arena District/Downtown. Happy Hour at Hyde Park and Elderflower Martini's. Oh and the Blue Jackets again. Vino 100. Bar 23 with Josh and Joe from High School. Did I already say vomit? Street Meet. Cannot call it Meat. Also disgusting. Waking up very late on Saturday and missing yoga at Lulu. Egg Sandwiches for breakfast made by yours truly. Driving through campus because it's too rainy to tailgate. Going to my mom's to see the kiddos. Back to F21 and back to the airport. Tim Hortons for soup. I still can't walk v good:( Crew game with mom and dad, doesn't rain at all! Yippee. Take a Saturday night off and sleep in on Sunday. Church then grocery store. Returning M.A.C. that I don't need, but really want. Endless activity of putting stuff away. Over to Molly's to watch Desperate Housewives and Brothers & Sisters. Cookies. Ugh Monday and back at my desk. Wishing I could say what I need to say. 6 days. Wow!
Friday, September 18, 2009
Counting Down
As a annoying as it is to others, my brain literally swirls around with dates (events, Birthdays, vacations, doctor appointments) and literally works in two weekend increments.
In otherwise within a two week time span from today, which I consider the weekend, I can to-a-fault tell you what's going on everyday and everynight. Now this isn't any big deal, but I can also tell this to you for most of the people I know who have let me in on their calendar. See what's that's annoying? I always know what's going on. In a way I pride myself on it.
So anywhoozers here are some things i'm counting down to in the next few weeks:
Tuesday 9/22 - Volleyball Tournament! I have really enjoyed volleyball this summer and in my opinion have possibly improved???
Wednesday 9/23 - Kings of Leon concert! Super annoying lately to try and get people on board with doing activities. Super.
Oh well, my bro and his girlfriend want to go, so i'll be the third wheel and hopefully the plans will stick!?!
Thursday 9/24 - Kari is commiiinnggg!!! My best friend from college and one of my closest friends in general!! Cannot wait to spend time with her and just get caught up! Also ROWE Fashion Show that night...new friends, cocktails etc. Oh an excuse to wear something real cute!
Friday 9/25 - Kari love fest continued and hopefully a chance for her to meet the boy! Cross yo fingers and yo toes:)
Saturday 9/26 - Illinois in town to play the Buckeyes AND wait for it...the hottest man alive - David Beckham. Becks better keep his fine ass healthy and show me what he's got (on the pitch of course!)
Oh and lets not forget...it's right around 45 days until I turn dirty 30...ugh!!!
In otherwise within a two week time span from today, which I consider the weekend, I can to-a-fault tell you what's going on everyday and everynight. Now this isn't any big deal, but I can also tell this to you for most of the people I know who have let me in on their calendar. See what's that's annoying? I always know what's going on. In a way I pride myself on it.
So anywhoozers here are some things i'm counting down to in the next few weeks:
Tuesday 9/22 - Volleyball Tournament! I have really enjoyed volleyball this summer and in my opinion have possibly improved???
Wednesday 9/23 - Kings of Leon concert! Super annoying lately to try and get people on board with doing activities. Super.
Oh well, my bro and his girlfriend want to go, so i'll be the third wheel and hopefully the plans will stick!?!
Thursday 9/24 - Kari is commiiinnggg!!! My best friend from college and one of my closest friends in general!! Cannot wait to spend time with her and just get caught up! Also ROWE Fashion Show that night...new friends, cocktails etc. Oh an excuse to wear something real cute!
Friday 9/25 - Kari love fest continued and hopefully a chance for her to meet the boy! Cross yo fingers and yo toes:)
Saturday 9/26 - Illinois in town to play the Buckeyes AND wait for it...the hottest man alive - David Beckham. Becks better keep his fine ass healthy and show me what he's got (on the pitch of course!)
Oh and lets not forget...it's right around 45 days until I turn dirty 30...ugh!!!
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
I cannot make this stuff up!
This could be the title of many of my blogs. As we well know my like is a reality tv show in the making-i'm just waiting for Mark Burnett to offer to produce it.
So last week at volleyball (which I should say has probably been one of the best things i've agreed to do this summer) Kevin, a fellow team member, stepped on my foot. Now granted, this was an accident, but he is not small. And I did think maybe my foot was broken, which would've been okay by me and I would have definitely milked some days off of work for it. But instead it was just badly bruised and very very painful. Very.
So fast forward to Friday when I decide that I deserve a pedicure.
I go to my favorite place on Polaris and skillfully avoid getting the "man." So my really nice lady Cinda and I are getting along just fine...she is fairly quiet and i'm chilling with the chair massager. Well we were so rudely interrupted by someone needing a wax. As luck would have it, Cinda is the only "waxer" on duty.
Enter "the man." Now I had specifically avoided him due to the fact that once before he pretended to give me pedicure and I believe it was more like man handling my foot.
Painful. Very painful.
So I tell "the man" as I had told Cinda, that I hurt my foot and to please be careful. He says to me "I have to rub out the pain." Say what? Hell no. He then proceeds to get some Asian oil (not being racist, it really was Asian oil) and vigorously rub my bruise. Let me tell you-there were tears streaming down my face and yet "the man" did not stop with the rubbing. So he proceeds to tell me that "tomorrow it will just be a small dot and this oil has magical healing powers."
Not so. It was a huge red dot the next day and now three days later is back to a bruise. Sometimes I pat myself on the back for being the kind of person that takes pictures of everything...below are the photo documentations of the shiz that went down...
Pardon my snaggle toe on the end
OMFG
See big red blob, not small dot!
Pardon my snaggle toe on the end
OMFG
See big red blob, not small dot!
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
Patience
Patience is a virtue. We all know that...well we all try and know that, right? My friend Kristin tells me over and over that i'm the most patient person she's ever met. Ya right!
No for real she's always talking about how I wait it out, make educated decisions, don't rush into things etc etc. Then I wait and wait and wait. And i'm sure there are things i'm still waiting on! So lately i've been feeling like she's on to something. I've been waiting 3 or so years to get my career started in Marketing. This week I started my first grad school class for my MBA in Marketing. You have no idear how invigorated I was!
Literally I saw flashes of myself five years ago (think pantsuit with t-shirt underneath so as not to be too stuffy) these are the kind of things I think about when plotting my future-my outfit. No really, let's get back to the point.
Everything happens for a reason-we don't need to go into how many ways i've experienced this. And I think if I started grad school a few years ago when I wanted to, I would probably not have been this motivated to better myself and lets be honest I would have half assed it.
Oh I was jacked like a rabbit yesterday!
I'm so excited! I might even start reading for next Tuesday's class tomorrow! Crazy talk:)
I can see it now "I started my career at Nationwide before transitioning to be one of the leading Marketing consultants in the area." LOVES IT!!
Monday, July 13, 2009
Blogging
I have not blogged in over a month! WHATTTT?? That is totally crazykins. Anyway I will blame my lack of blogging and rightfully so on the fact that there is something that I can't blog about but that I think about everyday. And I have a big mouth, so that equals me not blogging because I can't trust myself not to tell my "secret."
Okay...there is so much else going on...
1. My dad - Hopefully tomorrow is the day they find out about the tumor (hopefully lack there of) for sure. Not only is this such an incredible stress right now, but the way my family deals with any kind of issue makes me even more stressed! Their lack of urgency in finding out the outcome of all his CT Scans, MRI's etc is so ridiculous words cannot express! I will stop being selfish and remember that he is the most important person in this situation and not my lack of being "in charge."
2. My mother - as if the above referenced situation wasn't wacky enough, my mom may officially gone off the deep end. I am kidding and not kidding. Her questions to me have gotten more and more out of control and my lack of patience for her is zero. Zero tolerance.
3. My new apartment - why can't I get and stay happy about this? I'm REALLY really really looking forward to it, but I feel excited about the change only about 50% of the time! What is wrong with me? Someone please. Advice. Thanks!
4. Ex's - I don't have any ex's that are around. Maybe because I don't have that many ex's to begin with? LOL! Anyway...can someone please explain to me or shed some light on what an appropriate relationship with your ex should be, because I know very few people who have one.
5. Career - I have stated many times that I have a job and not a career. WELL since May i've really been hot on the trail of movin on up and I have some meet and greets coming up! Please say a prayer for me because I must must must get the career going! MUST!
Okay...there is so much else going on...
1. My dad - Hopefully tomorrow is the day they find out about the tumor (hopefully lack there of) for sure. Not only is this such an incredible stress right now, but the way my family deals with any kind of issue makes me even more stressed! Their lack of urgency in finding out the outcome of all his CT Scans, MRI's etc is so ridiculous words cannot express! I will stop being selfish and remember that he is the most important person in this situation and not my lack of being "in charge."
2. My mother - as if the above referenced situation wasn't wacky enough, my mom may officially gone off the deep end. I am kidding and not kidding. Her questions to me have gotten more and more out of control and my lack of patience for her is zero. Zero tolerance.
3. My new apartment - why can't I get and stay happy about this? I'm REALLY really really looking forward to it, but I feel excited about the change only about 50% of the time! What is wrong with me? Someone please. Advice. Thanks!
4. Ex's - I don't have any ex's that are around. Maybe because I don't have that many ex's to begin with? LOL! Anyway...can someone please explain to me or shed some light on what an appropriate relationship with your ex should be, because I know very few people who have one.
5. Career - I have stated many times that I have a job and not a career. WELL since May i've really been hot on the trail of movin on up and I have some meet and greets coming up! Please say a prayer for me because I must must must get the career going! MUST!
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
What I've Been Up Too
I've taken an unintentional break from blogging AND facebook! I know, i'm as shocked as you are...but i've been busy. Really busy. You know how it is when people say they're busy, but they're actually not - it's just an excuse to not see you? Well my friends in the blogoshpere, that is not what's going on here. I give you the top five things that have been occupying my time since last week:
5. Work
- It has been off the chain ridiculous. So much going on which makes it even more chaotic than usual. In addition to the organizational changes and my team leaving me for someone else (they're probably thrilled about this) i've had a new job opportunity come into the mix which i'm really excited about, but it's still up in the air.
4. Not living in a SUV by this lake thingy on the way to Jeffersonville
- this is sort of an inside joke, but it was my backup plan if I were in fact to get fired...I mean "let go." Scott let me know today that I would in fact be going with him to our new organization! I think my crying worked? Wait...did you really think I cried? Come on...I just begged a little:)
3. Moving
- I was prepped to move. Excuse me; i've been ready to move. So my bags all three or four or ten are packed. All I needed to do was move my bed, dresser, clothes and a few other miscellaneous things and it would have been a long chapter closed for me. Well Kim has had some really great movement with people looking at her house, so for right now that is off the table. I'm super excited for her, she needs/wants her house to sell something bad. We knew Murphy's Law would step in here the second I was ready. So for now, we'll put the Rosslyn Ave move on ice and start checking out apartments downtown!
2. Chicago
- I made it to the Windy this weekend. It had been awhile and looongg overdue, so I packed my snakeskin overnight bag and headed out on the road! It was super fun of course. Catching up with the usuals and then also Leah and Rachael from Judson (long overdue reunion.) I felt like a little bit of a party pooper because I didn't want to go "out" but seriously that part of my life is mostly over and I enjoy conversation where I can actually hear people now. So I did alot of face time, and I hoped everyone loved it as much as I did. The only thing I would change is having people meet me in a central location and not driving around so much. It's really time consuming and adds to the tiredness that traveling already causes.
1. Miami
- This is my first mention about this subject here, and I can't say that it won't be the last...I want to preserve the goodness and more importantly I need to do everything in my power to not jinx it. But let me just say that it's like I have no one else to talk to or spend time with. I could seriously talk to Miami for hours on end. Someone asked me yesterday what it is I don't like about M, and I had nothing. NOT ONE THING!! Oh no I said I wasn't going to jinx it, so i'm stopping. But I will say that you truly don't know how bad some relationships are until you have a good one. I think I have a good one **squeal**
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
To Buy or not the buy?
To buy or not to buy? This is the question i've been pondering at least 18 months. That's right...do the math, that means I've been thinking about it since way back in 2007.
So then another year went by and I finally had some greenbacks, but still not a ton of work experience. Moving to Chicago with little or no "real" work experience is silly and would've put me back to square one.
So FINALLY at the end of '07 I thought I would start looking for a place to call my own. Literally I looked at my 12-14 condos over the course of a few months. It made my head spin.
If I buy, i've got to get a home loan, find something nice and newer, in a desirable area, that will hold it's value, is close but not too close to my family, is close-ish to work.
????????????
I just can't decide! When I moved back to Columbus from Chicago, I had literally told myself that I would go back to the ci-tay in a year. Well that was a rough year for me. I didn't/couldn't find a "real" job for almost 6 or 7 months. So I spent my days working at a makeup counter and waitressing (good ole fallback:)So then another year went by and I finally had some greenbacks, but still not a ton of work experience. Moving to Chicago with little or no "real" work experience is silly and would've put me back to square one.
So FINALLY at the end of '07 I thought I would start looking for a place to call my own. Literally I looked at my 12-14 condos over the course of a few months. It made my head spin.
And the downtown in Columbus is not the downtown in Chicago,
and that truly is my main roadblock.
Well the time has come that I MUST make a decision about this. MUST.
If I rent, it's a matter of finding something reasonable that is nice and newer and is in a desirable area.If I buy, i've got to get a home loan, find something nice and newer, in a desirable area, that will hold it's value, is close but not too close to my family, is close-ish to work.
See the variables?
One clearly has more demands er-requirements.
I think I made up my mind. I think renting for 6 months and figuring out the relocation during that time and if i'm not going anywhere i'll buy.Yep, that is the decision. I'm sticking with that plan. For now anyway:)
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