My Story

I had to write a reflection paper for my grad school class today and told a little bit of my story since the last 12 years. Thought i'd share here since i'm in a sharing mood...

My story is not that different from many others. When my brothers and I were very young, my parents decided that they wanted a better life for us. For many families this sometimes means that one parent will switch careers, or maybe one will stay home to raise the kids. It could mean going to church more or spending more time at the dinner table. For us it meant that my parents would sell all of their belongings and only pack the clothes that could fit into four suit cases and move us from Cape Towne, South Africa to Columbus, Ohio USA. At age four this only seemed like a big adventure; and really how much could a child imagine all of the changes that would take place throughout their life based on this move?
Fast forward to junior year of high school and all the excitement that comes with not only picking a college, but deciding on a career. Now considering the insight that I’ve gained since being a teenager, I’ve come to realize that as adults it’s a complete disservice to try and ask a high schooler what they want to do for the rest of their lives and expect them to not only know without any uncertainty, but then to also carry that out without fail.

I always knew that I wanted to be a Journalist. I had all the soft skills: consistent ability to talk to anyone about anything, the desire to write papers, essays, poems and anything else people would read, and I should mention my “top notch” investigative skills. To this day research and background information are essential to me before I embark on anything. I’ve got to know the four W’s: Why, What, When and Where no matter the situation big or small. This thirst for knowledge has served me well, but also causes me to grossly over think so many minute details.

So back to picking a school. I wanted to be in a big city. I wanted a student body with a diverse population. I wanted the opportunity to follow my dreams and not have anyone around who would tell me those dreams were an impossibility. I chose a school in Suburban Chicago. About 45 minutes from “the Loop.” Perfect I thought. I couldn’t have been more wrong. That first year of school was probably one of the worst years of my life. Significant family problems took their toll on me both physically and mentally and eventually would prohibit me from returning for a second year. I was crushed. I had just started finding my niche and also really discovering who I was as a person, that wasn’t defined from being an immigrant or being an athlete or being “fill in the blank here.”

Through no deliberate choice of my own I ended up having to skip a year and a half of my education. What would have been my sophomore and first half of my junior year of college I spent working. I should have mentioned that one of my God giving talents is determination. I was determined that no matter how long it took, I would get back to school. That my dreams weren’t dead they were only on hold. In January of 2001, I packed my bags ready to start over at yet another suburban Chicago school as a 21 year old freshman. Not an ideal situation, but I did it! This time I chose to switch directions a bit (since none of my previous credits counted) I chose the Advertising/Public Relations route. A little more creative, but still right up my ally. The family problems continued as well as another unwelcome roadblock – anxiety attacks. Still I finished my degree in Interdisciplinary Communications and Business Management.

I started at Nationwide in 2006, about a year and half after I graduated from college and moved back to Columbus. I took my then job as a “stepping stone” position. To learn about the company and build my skills as a professional. I’ve always seen myself as someone not limited by their circumstance, or victimized by their past circumstances, but as a someone who can use all those stories and experiences to encourage others and be an example of what hard work and determination can lead to.

These classes at Marketing U have given me the opportunity to not only enhance my knowledge of Marketing, but tap back into all the things I love about the discipline. Some of the classes have not been as easy as others and this one definitely tackled the analytical side of my brain versus the creative side which is always churning away.

· I learned that my voice is still strong and valued even when I perceive it to be at a disadvantage.
· I learned that my experience in the work place can still be of use even though it is not specific to the subject matter at hand.
· I learned that despite having a million things going on, it’s possible to focus on just one at a time.

One of my favorite poems by Robert Frost ends with:”I took the road less traveled by, and that has made all the difference.” This is my story. The road less traveled by. It’s the opportunity that this class has continued to give me. I will always be grateful for what I have learned in these last weeks and the knowledge that will last me a lifetime.

Rain YES!!

Don't be alarmed. I haven't been abducted by aliens. Normally I would give the rain a thumbs down. 99 out of 100 times I hate it. Yes hate. Not today.
Today i'm liking it - let me explain why. There's a song on my Christian radio station that I think we can all relate to no matter what our religious preferences. I don't any of the exact words except for "Jesus bring the rain." My interpretation about the lyrics is that that the artist is asking God for a little bit of rain (normally bad) to bring out the good in him. To show him how strong he is and how strong his resolve to be a person of faith is. I've been really challenged with this lately because I feel like i've not really displayed my "best side" during the last couple challenges i've faced. I've given into reacting the way I see others react to situations to try and get the same result they do (their own way.) So the last few days i've really tried to stay true to myself and the values that I hold close to my heart despite what's going on around me.
So today it rained and messed up my car wash ha ha! But I am grateful. I feel like the rain was washing away the rest of the dirty snow and with that dirty snow all the stressful emotions of the last few weeks since it was dumped on us. Hopefully. Cross your fingers.

Trying to fit a square peg into a round hole

This is seriously how I feel right now. Honestly I just keep asking myself "what am I doing wrong?" For a very long time I have not felt like my best was not good enough. But right now, I can come up with nothing that is good. I'm in more than just a funk. The reality is that things are not going well for me right now. Personally, professionally...all the ally's are not giving me anything to hang on to...it's very sad. I'm in a constant state of feeling sorry for myself and in a more constant state of trying to not feel sorry for myself. The contradiction itself is enough to cause my heartbeat to race.
I am a glass half full person. But as we speak (well I type and you read) my glass is literally half empty. I dunno what to do? Really I don't? I'm trying to quote Bible verses, and stay busy, and exercise, and eat right, and spend time with those that matter...but it's just not adding up:(
I thought...maybe if I go on a vacation? What if I went to Chicago for the weekend? But then I think "I shouldn't travel because what if something happens with work? I'll be mad I spent the money!" But then the me that's always sunny thinks "everything will be fine, and you should surround yourself with people and things that you love."
This post is so depressing...i'm sorry! But, I do feel better getting a little of it out there:)

OK

So it's Sunday (no kidding you say?) Sunday always makes me think of Monday and then suddenly i'm in a horrible mood. Well it's not horrible exactly, it's more malaise peppered with a little anxiety.
I had a horrible week last week. HORRIBLE. Seriously one thing after the next just kept going wrong and I could not get my mind to snap into "I will survive" mode. Without the kindness and friendship of a few key people I would have seriously taken a trip to the middle of nowhere and gladly stayed there.
So i'm thinking this week has got to be different! I must make it different! I've got to gather my killer optimism, by natural energetic bounce and my personal favorite: motivator to all those around me.
I needed alot of motivation last week. So sad because I hate having a pity party. But the pity sometimes is a necessary evil....dontcha think? I feel much better having been patted on the back a few times, but i'm ready to kick it into gear tomorrow! So dare I say this??? But c'mon Monday - show me what you got! I've got an army on my side that can last longer than 24 hours! HA!

I'm Justa Girl

So there are very few times, but every now and then I hate being a girl!

Today was obviously one of those times ha ha! I know I make a big production over "how independent" I am, but getting my car out of the snow is just a pain in my very ample rear!

You would not have wanted to dig my car out either...don't judge!

With that said, here are a couple of other times I also loathe my "girlness."

1. Cramps. Nuff Said.

2. Cleaning the bathroom. Always makes me want to vom!

3. Taking out the trash. So gross.

4. Any sort of activity that has to do with moving.

5. Driving myself home after going out.

6. Driving in general.

7. Going to weddings alone.

8. Straightening my hair.

9. Having to call any sort of customer service place.

10. Picking out a restaurant. Silly I know, but i'd rather you pick!

The Bachelor

Brace yourselves. I haven't been on my soapbox for at least a couple of days! So I know The Bachelor is entertaining and all, i've watched most seasons, but really - is this really the reality that single people live in? Now I know that a good man is hard to find, but these girls are definitely desperate and bordering on having zero self respect. If the guy that you were dating flat out told you he was seeing three other girls - i'm sorry, not seeing sleeping with, would you really stick around to see if he loved you the most? If you would, we gots to talk!!
Okay so I know that this is a tv show and therefore my little rant is slightly ridiculous, but honestly!! When you're a)divorced and on a dating show b)divorced and saying you've never been in love c)divorced and going straight to being engaged to someone else without a little time in between...you might be headed for divorce again. Just sayin.
I just feel bad because it is hard to find someone, but this really really isn't the way to go about it!

Girl Crush

No it's not what you think. But yesterday was a monumental day for me. Ever since I started working out at the gym in Nationwide there's this girl i've tried to talk to a few times, but no instant connection was made (if you know me, you know I love the instant connections:)
This girl is tall, and fit and has the prettiest long blonde hair! Usually she's the type of girl i'd be jealous of, but I gave up being jealous of other people a long time ago!! Her dedication to the gym is truly admirable and I think she works out twice a day (I can't confirm this because it would take a bit of "recon" if you know-what-i'm-sayin!)
So yesterday i'm in the locker room and Allison starts chatting me up! We talked about how we're both trying to read more this year AND work out even when we're tired!! Commonalities!
Then she asks my name and says "oh it's beautiful!"
So Allison who works in the OGC...my new friend!!